A blog post to end a very long day...

I have to say that today was my 4th IUI...therefore, I expected it to be a piece of cake. No big deal, I take a long lunch and fit in a little insemination with my cheeseburger. Nope. I'm not even gonna lie, that shit hurt. Seriously. Ouch.

This was my first IUI with Dr. M and I know everyone has their own way of doing things. The procedure itself was actually less painful than the others I have had, which I thought was a good sign. Yes, it was a little weird when he left the speculum in me while he left the too, to go get the specimen. And while it was a nice gesture to warm up the lube and turn up the heat in the room, it got a little uncomfortable. With my previous IUIs, I got up pretty much right after and got dressed and left...which is why I was so surprised when Dr. M told me to roll over onto my stomach and stay there for 30 minutes. What?? I'm on my lunch break fool!

Anyway, I laid there writhing in pain for 30 minutes (okay, 25 minutes because I couldn't stand anymore). Yes, I said writhing. Seriously, the cramps were horrendous, like nothing I have ever experienced. Really makes me look forward to childbirth haha. Luckily, they died down after 25 minutes or so and I got dressed and left. On the way out, the doc also gave me a prescription for progesterone (which I do not get to take by mouth if you were thinking that I was that lucky by the way) along with instructions to come in for a progesterone serum test on Monday blah blah blah. I stopped for some Tylenol on the way back to work and finished out my shift. All in all, it has been a long day and I am exhausted. But I know that I won't even remember the exhaustion or the pain once I get that positive HPT. Then it will all have been worth it. For now, though, I will take Tylenol and nurse my sensitive, painful, exhausted ovaries.

Goodnight xoxo

4th IUI...

Had another appointment with Dr. M yesterday morning. We had to do another post-coital test to see if an IUI would be necessary. Good news is, the Menopur did help with my CM. I didn't notice any difference, but the doctor said that it was really helping the little guys swim. However, the results still showed some problems with abnormal sperm, which is not great for our chances. It only takes one though!

Based on these observations, Dr. M suggested we abstain yesterday afternoon and do an IUI today. I expressed my concerns about this since I got my positive OPK on Sunday morning, but he said it can still up our chances. This will be our 4th IUI, so this isn't my first rodeo. Previously, we've always done it the day after a trigger shot, and obviously it hasn't worked. The doctor explained that most women release an egg 24-48 hrs after getting a positive OPK, but then the egg is viable for about 24 hours after it is released. We have always tried to catch the egg before it dropped, so now we will try to catch it on its way out I guess. It may be a waste, but I know it at least cant hurt, and each cycle we get closer to IVF. So you better believe I will do what I can to make the magic happen before that is necessary!

So now I am getting ready for work and planning out how to tell my boss that I have to leave early to get inseminated....maybe I will choose different words haha! Luckily, I work with all women, and I "came out" to them about my infertility struggles a while ago, so I don't expect it will be too awkward. Please cross your fingers, toes, and Fallopian tubes for us!

Xoxo

A better day...

Today was a much better day. I decided to take an OPK before my appointment just in case, even though I usually don't get positives until late afternoon. Color me surprised when I got a smiley face on my little ClearBlue Easy digital OPK! I ran to the other room to tell the husband that we got a smiley face...and of course he knew what that meant because he knows waaaaay too much about this stuff.

This put me in a much better mood going into my appointment with Dr. M this morning. We did a followup U/S and the two dominant follies matured even more, and measured about 19 and 21. And because I got a positive on the OPK, I didn't have to do a stupid trigger shot. Yay! Plus, I don't have to do any more shots. Score for my bum! The doctor does want me to come in tomorrow morning for another post-coital test, which I hate. However, the Menopur did not seem to help with my CM like we hoped, so it's probably a good idea. I asked if it would be too late to do an IUI I'd the test doesn't show great news, and he said no, that we could do one the next day if necessary. Lets hope it's not necessary, but I wanna do what is needed to make this cycle work. Otherwise, the husband will have to freeze some of his magic so I can use it when he is gone next month.

Thank you all for your kind words and for sticking with me through my pity party the other day. I'll keep you posted as this cycle progresses :)

Merry Christmas Eve Eve

Today was a great day.  My wonderful husband got tickets to go see The Nutcracker and surprised me with them earlier this week.  It was a small production by the Ballet Northwest in Olympia, WA, and it was so much fun.  Some may not think to go to this type of production, instead opting for larger ballets in Seattle, but this was perfect for us.  Not stuffy at all, the audience mostly filled with families of the children in the production.  I loved it.  I was a dancer up until I graduated high school, and while I knew that I was not destined to be a ballet dancer (too curvy, bad balance, no natural flexibility), I love to watch others and to get lost in the magic of it.

After the ballet, we tried a new restaurant for dinner.  I am still gluten-free (and doing pretty damn well, if I do say so myself), which unfortunately limits my options and makes me not look forward to going out as much as I used to.  While this restaurant didn't have a lot of options for me, they did have a gluten-free pizza crust, so I was able to enjoy a pizza instead of the salad I am usually stuck with.  I love salad, but it gets a little old, especially when I have to watch the husband scarf down some wonderfully sinful dish across the table from me.  I also had a margarita...or what was supposed to be a margarita.  It came in a martini glass, though, and pretty much tasted like pure tequila.  Don't worry, I am not complaining.  For once, I got my money's worth on a mixed drink at a restaurant.

Christmas is low-key in our household this year.  Since we are going to have some large medical expenses coming up, we chose to not really do presents this year except a couple small things between ourselves.  Tomorrow, we will wake up and enjoy the day together and then go to our friend's house for appetizers and holiday cheer.  Christmas day will be spent at home watching movies and just relaxing.  It may not seem like much to anyone else, but I am just happy to have my husband home for the holidays.  Hopefully next year, we will be hanging Baby's 1st Christmas ornaments on the tree, but for now, I am happy to have my health, my husband, and my family and friends.

Merry Christmas Eve Eve!!

P.S. For those out there that are going through infertility right now, here are some tips from Resolve New England on how to cope during the holidays.  I recommend checking it out.

So excited...

So tomorrow is the big day.  I am finally venturing out and getting a second opinion from another fertility specialist.  While it is great getting free care on base....it would be nice to be more than just a name on a chart.  After many recommendations and success stories, I am going to see "Dr. M" in Olympia.  I am pretty nervous since the husband isn't here to go with me.  Hopefully that isn't a problem for them.  Considering he has always tested normal, I don't think it should be a big deal.  It would just be nice to have some support and a shoulder to lean on.  Plus, I am a nervous wreck about it.  I mean, I am basically hoping that this guy will look at my records and find some little thing that the other doctors missed (shouldn't be hard since I've seen every doctor on base and they basically all ignored me.  Even after cutting me open.  Whatevs).

On another note, I am still totally gluten-free.  I think it is going pretty well.  It's definitely tough for me since I love all the things I can't have, but I am learning to be creative.  The real test will be when the husband comes home.  He is supportive and tries to be helpful, but I know he is not going to stop eating gluten, and I don't expect him too.  I will have to get beer for him for when he comes home...and it will be very difficult to not have one for myself!  Oh well, it's probably good for my waistline to avoid a beer or three two.  Maybe I will live a little and get some gluten-free beer.  Eww.

Wish me luck for tomorrow!  I will post about my appointment tomorrow night.  I know it is just a consultation, but hopefully he will be able to at least give me some hope.

Ciao :)

Missing gluten...

Yep, I jumped on the gluten-free bandwagon.  Let me tell you, I am NOT a fan (read: I miss beer).

As you all now know, I have what is referred to as Unexplained Infertility.  This is unacceptable to me.  Because of this "diagnosis" I have been doing my own research and looking for alternative therapies, supplements, etc.  While doing my research, I came across many articles discussing the link between gluten and infertility.  Apparently, there is quite a large number of women out there that couldn't get pregnant and couldn't find out why (sound familiar?).  When all else failed, they decided to cut gluten out of their life.  All of a sudden, they found themselves pregnant the natural way.  And I do mean all of a sudden.  We are talking like within 4 weeks.  I figure, what the hell?  It can't hurt.

Okay, I lied.  It does hurt.  For those of you that don't know me personally, I have to admit that I love beer.  Love it.  I love to drink a Corona Light on a hot Summer day, and I love to sip on a Pabst Blue Ribbon (keepin it classy) during a UFC fight with the husband.  I also love whole wheat bread and pastries and all that other great stuff, but it is really the beer that I miss the most.  Yes, there are now many different companies that make gluten-free beer.  Sorry, it just isn't the same.  No offense, but I find it kind of gross.  This is disappointing to say the least.  But, if the end result is me getting knocked up, I will give just about anything up.

One thing I hate about going "gluten-free" is the stigma attached to it.  It is such a fad right now and everyone is doing it.  To everyone else, gluten is a mystery.  I definitely didn't know until the whole gluten-free fad took off in the last year or so.  So now I am trying it.  I think I will try to go completely gluten-free for 3 months to see if it makes any difference with my fertility or just my health in general.  Don't get me wrong, there is definitely a learning curve here.  I will probably make a lot of mistakes and might even cheat a little because I am weak...but I am going to try.  Eating out is the real test, but I guess it just means I don't need to eat out as much as I do when the husband is around.

Wish me luck (and drink a beer for me)!