Monday, January 21, 2013

Sad times...

Sorry, I have not really been around for the last few days.  We have been home in California with the husband's family.  We came here to be with my mother-in-law, but she passed yesterday.  I know that she is no longer in pain and that she is now in peace, but it is still a very sad time for my family.  I feel lucky that I was able to come home to see her and to say goodbye.  But I am sad and angry that she is gone.

I am sad that she will never get to see her baby (my husband) be a dad.  I am sad that my child(ren) will never get to know her.  She was a wonderful, giving, unselfish person that loved being a grandmother so much.  Her family was her life, and you could tell that by the number of people that were by her side when she died.

I am angry that my body is messed up somehow and I was unable to produce a grandchild for her before she died.  I am angry that my husband had to lose his mom at such a young age.  And I am angry that my father-in-law has lost his soulmate.

I have a hard time when the husband leaves for just a few weeks or months, and I cannot imagine losing him for good.  While I do not pray because I don't know what I believe in, my thoughts are with my husband's family during this hard time.  More than ever, I am glad that we will be moving closer to home so that we can help and support the family.  Please keep our family in your thoughts.

3 comments:

  1. Oh Steph, I'm so sorry. That has to be so hard. My thoughts are definitely with you guys during this time. I hope you can find some peace.

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  2. Steph, I am so sorry to read this. I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts. I understand your pain and anger. We lost my father in law 41 days after our wedding in 2011. It was so hard, and we miss him everyday. Hugs.

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  3. Please except my condolences. My heart goes out to your family during this difficult time. I lost my father when I was 25 and it was one of the hardest things I have ever been through. Hoping as days and weeks pass, things will get a little easier.

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